Meemee at our wedding, June 2011 |
My mom has been taking trips to see Meemee every few months.
Meemee just went through removal of bladder cancer along with more cancer taking over parts of her body.
My mom, being many states away, wants to be able to see her as often as she can.
This time around I asked if I could join on the trip.
Yes, she was just here in June for the wedding, but I wasn't able to spend much time with her.
During a wedding your focused on everything going on in your mind and making sure you spend time with EVERYONE who has traveled to be here for your wedding.
So this trip was a more personal trip that I was super excited about.
I was also a tad bit scared.
Family have been telling my mom that she has lost 90 lbs.
I couldn't believe it and had no idea what I was going to see when I got there.
As we landed in California mom turned on her phone and had a text saying today was a bad day for Meemee.
Cancer has a way of having "good days" and "bad days".
The drive to Meemee's and Papo's house was a long one and it seemed like we would never get there.
I couldn't wait to see her, even if she was having a bad day.
When we got to Meemee and Papo's and the door opened I saw someone who was my Meemee but sure didn't look like her!
I now see what everyone was telling me about!
She lost 90 lbs!
Damn you cancer!!!!
Meemee Sept 2011 |
Meemee January 2012 |
She was unable to move from her chair the first night we were there.
She came in and out of sleeping during the evening.
Mom and I decided it was time for bed.
I didn't think I was tired because I had slept 3.5 hours on the plane.
But I think I was emotionally tired after seeing my Meemee in such pain.
Day 2 was a "good day" both Meemee and I slept 13 hours that night! WOW!
She woke up and ate a donut plus was moving around the house.
It was like my old Meemee was back!
We talked, we laughed, we shared stories from the past, and more!
Meemee shared with me that something is causing her bowel to be closed off and she's having a hard time eating.
Doctors are going to get a CAT scan to figure out what it is.
She is on a liquids only diet.
Auntie Fran and Cody came over and more laughter!
Meemee decided she felt good enough to leave the house and have dinner at Auntie Fran's.
So we left and she laid down for a nap.
I took my first, and probably my last, trip to Costco to get things for dinner! OMG craziness!
Dinner was YUMMY!
Family time was the best part!
Day 3 was another "good day"!!!
I was thanking the Lord that she was feeling better!!
Meemee shared with me how she has to take care of herself due to removal of her bladder.
It's so amazing to see what science and doctors have done to allow someone to continue living without their bladder.
It was also sad and depressing to see.
Meemee had to go to her Chemo appointment and talk to the doctor about her meds.
While she did that, I was able to meet mom's best friend and maid of honor: Trisha.
They talked, talked and talked some more!
Such girls they were ;)
Then Meemee was done, we were back at the house, and plans to BJs was in place for dinner!
We went to BJs with Meemee, Auntie Fran, Cody, Michael, William, Uncle Tom and Mom.
Another sucessful night of laughter and story telling!
I love my family!
Day 4- "baaaaadddd day"
I had been sleeping with an eye mask and ear plugs- mom snores and old people get up a lot at night! lol
I felt my mom jerk out of bed but I kept on sleeping. (Apparently it was 5am)
I woke up at 7:30 and walked out into the living room.
Papo was asleep on the couch and my mom was in bed with Meemee.
I was a little confused and I didn't want to wake anyone up, so I climbed back in bed.
A few minutes later I heard throwing up, crying, and painful sounds.
I came out of the room to see Meemee throwing up, mom getting a wet washcloth, and Papo getting her more trash cans.
I couldn't believe it!
What could she be throwing up?
She was in a lot of pain and you could hear it.
It was so hard to listen to and know you couldn't do anything about it.
Plus seeing the worry on Papo and moms face was enough to make you want to sob.
I sat in the livingroom and said a prayer asking the Lord to help my Meemee.
A few minutes later mom was sitting next to me praying and crying.
She would stop for a few minutes and it would continue again after a few more minutes.
Time came for us to pack up and head to the airport.
Mom kept going in Meemee's room to lay down next to her and just look at her and tell her she loved her.
A moment I will keep with me forever.
Then the hardest part came, time to say goodbye.
Mom climbed into the bed to say bye and I jumped into the bed right after her.
Tears started streaming, I love you's, promises', "this isn't fair" was said a lot, prayers, and lots of kissing.
Another moment I will keep with me forever.
We got up from the bed with wet faces and shirts from our tears, grabbed our suit cases to walk out the door, and mom was back in the bed with Meemee.
More tears, more I love you's, more promises', kisses, and more prayers.
We made it to the car and drove to In-N-Out while sobbing. (This was probably very dangerous!)
Some In-N-Out dried up the tears but didn't erase the pain.
On the plane when we made it up into the air mom waved out the window, "I love you Mom!"
And it made me realize how special a bond is between a mother and daughter.
There is no best friend as important as your mother.
You only have one.
I am lucky to have the best mother there is.
Cancer SUCKS!
Meemee, I love YOU more!
I loved reading your feelings. Know always that she loved having you both here, even on the bad days. The times together like this make us a stronger family. And remember, we are going to love her thought this!
ReplyDeleteLove, Auntie